Top 3 Hidden Blocks That Keep You From Your Heart’s Desires

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Do you ever wonder why certain things just don’t happen for you…

You can’t seem to meet your ideal partner…

You can’t seem to break out of your financial stress…

Or you just can’t get your body as healthy, fit and strong as you know it could be?

No matter how hard you try, no matter how much action you take…SOMETHING keeps blocking you?

If this sounds familiar, read on.

What most people don’t realize is that there are active hidden blocks within us that we MUST learn to identify and dismantle or they will keep getting in the way over and over again.

Here are the top 3 hidden blocks that may be getting in YOUR way:

1. Is that really your desire?

Having desires that aren’t authentic to us is a major hidden block. Over our life span we tend to take on familial or cultural desires, without realizing they aren’t really coming from our soul, but rather a survival instinct to fit in. Perhaps we want to look a certain way because we adopted a desire from the media. Perhaps we are holding out for a certain life partner because our parents projected to us a type of mate that was “suitable” for us at a young age. Perhaps we think if we don’t earn a 6 figure income that there’s something wrong with us and we just won’t ever be happy.

Most of our adult desires stem from unmet childhood needs. One way to determine if a desire is coming from our divine innermost self is to measure our degree of NEED for it. If we are desperately attached to a desire, chances are it may be a false desire. Our true desires have an expansive feel to them as if they are already ours and easeful to create. There is anticipation and perhaps even a bit of nervousness but no inner pressing, pushing or forcing around them. We feel a fullness and faith simply with the desire in our heart, well before it comes into physical fruition. Release or redefine your desires that are not true and direct you precious efforts to those that are!

2. Fear of getting what you want.

There are 2 levels of fear, fear that we know consciously know we have and fear that we don’t know we have. Conscious fear is a block in and of itself, but at least we can see it and work with it! Unconscious fear, on the other hand, could be sabotaging your dreams without you even realizing. If there is a true desire that is continuously elusive to you, ask yourself:

What might I be afraid of happening if I actually receive this?

What could I lose if I manifest this desire?

What are the potential costs or consequences of getting what I want?

These questions will illuminate your unconscious fears that keep a thick wall between you and your soul’s desires. Face these fears and the wall will dissolve!

3. Lies, lies, lies.

Your belief system could be infested with lies about your worth, your abilities to manage or your safety and security. Most of us end up with a collection of limiting beliefs in one or more of these areas. Until we tease out the stories that we have agreed to as true (which are not) these stories will continue to determine how we experience our reality. For instance if, say you just can’t meet a partner that is a good match for you ask:

Do I truly believe I am worthy of a loving and devoted partner?

Do I believe I can manage intimacy in a thriving, mature and harmonious relationship? 

Do I truly believe I will be safe and secure in my ideal relationship?

If any of these made you squirm, even a little, you will want to look at the limiting beliefs you have and learn to rewire you brain accordingly so you feel 100% worthy, capable, safe and secure getting what you desire!

Because you deserve your heart’s desires,

Bec xoxo

PS. Stay tuned for an exciting, collaborative project I am putting together for you coming out in September!! It’s a NEW powerful, free resource designed to help you break through your hidden blocks for good!!

 

 

 

This Secret Will DRASTICALLY Improve Your Love Life

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If your love life is thriving right now, you can skip this post…

Unless you have conflict in any other relationships, (like with your family or friends…)

Then you will definitely want to know about this secret too.

 

What I am about to share with you is one of the most profound truths about love and relationship that I’ve come across in a while.

It comes from one of my favorite authors, Red Hawk, in his book Self-Remembering.

 

Red Hawk talks about our mind’s habit of thinking unnecessarily and the HUGE cost of that.

 

Consider this for a moment, how much of your day is spent in unnecessary thinking?

I don’t know about you but I catch myself thinking unnecessarily ALL DAY LONG. At the gym, in the shower, making a smoothie, driving my car – SURE, I am doing some NECESSARY thinking here too, but if I’m going to be honest there’s a lot more unnecessary thinking going on.

It’s legitimate to think about what weight I will lift next, or which shampoo to use, or how many blueberries to add.

But what about all that worrying about future project deadlines, wondering about real estate trends, judging how someone drives or hoping that person liked the gift I got them. These thoughts are not useful in the present moment; they don’t help to solve a current technical problem or to communicate with another. They steal my focus and energy because they are unnecessary.

So how does this apply to love and relationships?

( I love this part!)

Red Hawk describes unnecessary thinking as:

A strategy of the mind to avoid LOVE!!

(FYI to the mind, love is terrifying because it is so vast and limitless.)

When we are lost in the incessant stream of thought in our heads we are taken away from the present moment. Catapulted into the past or future. Wrapped up in judgement, fear and apprehension.

BUT it is in the present moment that all LOVE resides – not yesterday or tomorrow. NOW and only now is where love is.

If we are THINKING all the time (past, future) how can we experience love in the form of intimacy with others? (NOW!)

So what can we do? How can we apply this truth to improve our love lives and all our other relationships too??

Glad you asked.

Keeping our attention rooted in the present is like treading water. If we stop working at it, we start sinking. Our attention automatically bounces back into past/future, ergo we disconnect from the experience of life as love.

We need to practice so we can build strong PRESENCE muscles. And the best way to do that is to have a daily mediation practice for a minimum of 10 minutes, simply observing your bodily sensations vs. the thoughts in your head. Those 10 minutes is like going to the LOVE-GYM. We train our attention so it gets good at staying in the NOW. That way you will actually be able to stay “in the moment” long enough and often enough to give and receive love with others.

In the present you have UNLIMITED access to love because that’s also where we connect to divine love, love eternal.

I urge you to verify this for yourself. Start a Presence Practice for 10 minutes every morning for a week. Watch how much easier it is for you to actually BE WITH (experience love with) the people most dear to you. To hear them, feel them and give love to them just simply through your presence with them!

To living life as LOVE,

Bec xoxo

 

PS. Remember, unnecessary thinking is COSTING you (big time) in your love life and in all your relationships. If you really want thriving relationships this is not something to skim over. It’s normal to need help with changing your habits of being. If you want to learn more about how I can help, take a moment and apply for a free Discovery Session with me here.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How To Kiss Procrastination and Self-Sabotage Goodbye!

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Is there something you really want to create in your life right now but you keep getting side-tracked?

Do you get distracted from that novel you want to write?

Too busy and overwhelmed to start dating?

Putting off researching that business idea you have been nursing for years because of some on-going drama or chaos?

We all face procrastination and self-sabotage from time to time…it’s the ego, hard at work, “protecting” us from change and keeping us “safe” in our little box.

But there comes a time when you have to stand up for your dreams and desires.

When the price of putting things off becomes too high. You feel stuck and anxious in life. Your soul writhes and burns for you to evolve and express yourself truly, fully.

This is the time to stare your fear-based ego square in the eyes and say, “no more stalling, please step aside. I have beauty and peace to create in my life.”

It is in that moment of alignment where you must commit to creating what your soul is asking for.

And it helps to have a trick up your sleeve to drown out the whines of your ego and bypass procrastination and self-sabotage.

I am about to share with you one of the most powerful tools to keep you in the actions of creation. This tool will help you keep forward momentum and make progress towards your divine destiny. Not only will it help prevent procrastination and self-sabotage from happening but it will also support you to quickly get back on track if or when it does.

It’s called: Your Why.

Identifying and connecting with the deepest reason and ultimate outcome behind your desires is fuel for your fire.

Most of us never dig deep into the “whys” of our heart’s desires.

We sense why but don’t give that why a lot of focus or connection.

It’s when we are disconnected to our deepest reason for creating something that we allow ourselves to delay. And in delaying we create existential agony in our hearts. Yes, pain.

Here’s the invitation…

Right now, this moment, identify your deepest desire – the one that keeps getting put off.

Got it?

Now ask your heart, “Why do you want to create this?”

Other variations of this question include:

“Why is this really important to you?”

“What does creating this make possible?”

“What is the cost of not creating this?”

THEN… Ask this question again with respect to your answer, and again until you get to the root of your desire!

For example:

“I desire to create a loving, grown-up, mutually nourishing partnership.”

Why? “Because it allows me to co-create a family and children.”

Why is this important? “Because I will have a consistent arena to express and experience the depths of intimacy and unconditional love and service to others.”

This is the root of your unique desire, this is what you are really after. It is a reflection of your core values, your soul’s food and innermost passion…that which is most important for you to create and experience while you are on the planet.

It’s not the guy and the kids…it’s your soul’s thirst for intimacy.

So the next time you are too busy or caught up in drama to do what it takes to prepare for a relationship or make yourself available for connection you can remind yourself:

What I am really putting off here is my soul’s deepest desire to explore the profound experience of intimacy and unconditional love.”

It can be useful to find an image that represents intimacy and unconditional love and place it where you can easily see it daily.

This will bolster your motivation to step out of your ego’s little box a bit more each day and take the action necessary.

If the root of your desire isn’t compelling for you it may mean your desire was never authentic to begin with – perhaps it’s your parents’ desire for you or something you thought you should want because everyone else seems to want it. In this case – you are allowed to completely release this desire and redirect your focus and energy towards something that truly and deeply stirs your soul!

Remember why,

Bec xoxo

PS. There is a great chapter in my book Inspired Income about “Your Why” especially focussed on the deepest reasons to make more money and create income streams. If you haven’t checked it out yet you can find it here.